Home for 3 years and 2 months

It is amazing how a child who lived in an orphanage for 3 years of his life still has effects from his time there. Calvin has been home with us now for 2 months longer than he was in the orphanage and yet he still is trying to catch up with his peers. Calvin is at a 4 year old level for fine and gross motor skills (he is 6 years old). I would say his biggest obstacle is sensory input. He seeks sensory input most of the time. It is  mostly touch, but also oral and his body in space. Calvin falls a lot, which is difficult in the summer months because his knees and elbows are constantly bleeding and torn up from falling off his bike, running and falling etc. He runs and never walks! He is full of life and loves life. He is the happiest kid I know.

Calvin will eat anything and everything which is a blessing. He especially loves food that are spicy and strong in taste. He will eat raw onions, Indian food, anything that has a strong flavor. In his words today, " Do you know why I love pepperoni, because it is spicy".

Calvin is very intelligent, observant, inquisitive and outgoing. He loves to go out, wants to go places all the time. He can go to a place once and be able to tell you how to go there again. He is a quick learner, which is difficult for me because he is able to do 1st grade work but socially is behind his peers. I am home schooling him but he does play soccer right now, and is involved at church in their Awana program (memorizing scripture, playing games and Bible time). So he is interacting with kids his age, however he is socially like a 4/5 year old. We will probably keep him back a year in school because of this. Calvin asks questions my girls never have. How do plans fly, how do you stop the car, does God scratch his hand when he is itchy, etc. So we go to the library and get books so he can learn the answers.

Calvin has done well in attachment with us, which I know is usually a concern for adoptive parents. He still, however, is too friendly with adults. For example at Awana, he hugged the game person, who isn't a close friend of ours. No big deal right? Well, it is because other kids don't do that. I am a Sunday school teacher and none of the other kids hug me ever.  He knows we are mom and dad and we provide for his needs. He is an affectionate little boy. He asks for hugs and kisses all the time. He likes to snuggle in our bed too. He really has come along way. He pushed us away when he came home if we hugged him. But we continue to work with him about what is appropriate behavior with others and socially.

Calvin still has a difficult time entertaining himself. Some of it is personality though too. He is social and wants to be with others. He wants to play with someone, not alone. He cries if I tell him to go and play, he wants to play with me or by me. Calvin also cries very easily and gets frustrated when something is difficult to do. We have to take time outs to calm down. He is a very sweet boy, not malicious at all.

We are blessed and continue to help him each day reach his full potential. His handwriting has improved greatly, his reading is going well, he is enjoying starting math this year and he loves playing games as a family. He is full of life, and does everything fast! His language is great, however, he still needs to slow down and put his thoughts together to make a complete sentence. He will start in middle of a thought and expect you to know what he is referring to. 'Dad it makes a noise and is so fun', what makes noise Calvin? "The helmet makes noise mom! "

So that is our son in a nutshell. If you are a new adoptive family, I hope this was encouraging and if you are an 'old friend' we keep persevering and helping our kiddos be the best they can be. We love him so much and feel blessed to be called his mom and dad.

Update on Calvin

6 months later....
Calvin attended a charter school from September- November, and then we withdrew him. He is homeschooled now. Since being home he is reading, his handwriting has improved 100% and his behavior has improved. When he was in the Young 5's program there were 23 children and 1 teacher. Calvin came home every day saying he was off 'green' and on 'yellow' for not obeying. He started being disrespectful towards us and he was chewing on everything and exhibiting stressful behavior.

We felt Calvin would improve in his fine motor skills and writing if he was home with me. I was very happy with the OT and PT he was getting at the school but it wasn't worth it. Once we brought him home full time we signed him up for gymnastics/tumbling to help with his gross motor skills and muscles. He has come so far.

For homeschooling we have been using Handwriting without Tears and for his reading we use Learning to Read in 20 lessons. He is on Chapter 13 which I think is 1st grade level. He is doing awesome. He can draw his shapes now and all his letters so we will be moving onto the Kindergarden book in the fall. We will also be doing Math U See in the fall. His favorite things are painting, play dough, laying on the floor and pushing cars, pretending to be Spiderman and bouncing on his bouncy ball.  Starting in April he will be playing soccer again. He is looking forward to the treats.

On the medical front, Calvin had a cardiology appointment in February.  Without going into to much medical jargon  Calvin's doctors believe he has to have another heart surgery, probably next Spring Break (2015). His medications have been increased to see if it will make a difference. Looking at Calvin you would never know he was born with a heart defect. He runs and keeps up with his peers, he is busy busy. Our doctors keep saying he doesn't 'look' like his heart looks.

Calvin has come so far and we are so proud of him and all he has accomplished.  I will update again when he has been home 3 years in July and share with you all he he has accomplished in the 3 years he has been home. He is a different boy!

Spring Break 2014

 Calvin loved Mickey.

Calvin looking so much older with his new hair cut. He will be 6 years old soon!