Life

I feel like I have neglected my blog but life happens and it was more exciting to write while we were waiting for our son to come home. Now he is home and life goes on.
We are busy with our children. Calvin loves soccer and he is doing very well at home with his schooling. He is a great mathematician and has a great personality. He loves to be with people and is a great conversationalist. He dislikes reading, like most 6 yr old boys, and does not have much patience for coloring or handwriting. He has shown much improvement with his OT and is stronger every day. Like all children we have our good days and our testing days. Calvin has checkups for his heart condition every 6 months and the last appointment was for a heart cath in December. We heard from the doctor and they decided not to do surgery again so we will wait and see how his heart continues to function on medications.

Our middle child keeps us busy with her gymnastics. We travel out of state quiet a bit on weekends to see her compete. She is a perfectionist in her school work and sport. She loves to do crafts like knitting and sewing in her spare time which is far and between.

Our eldest recently turned 12 and she does swim team. She gets to compete when we are home from gymnastics. She is starting to enjoy reading and growing into a beautiful young lady.

I am busy with driving the kids to their activities most nights and watching them compete in swimming and gymnastics. So thankful Calvin only plays soccer in the Spring and Fall. He keeps me busy during the day with OT and homeschooling. I am so thankful for this season of life to spend time with my children whether it is catching up in the car one on one to practice or snuggling in bed in the morning before homeschooling.  We are blessed beyond measure and thank our God for all his blessings and trials that bring us closer to Him. Parenting is hard but rewarding. I lean on Him every day.

Home for 3 years and 2 months

It is amazing how a child who lived in an orphanage for 3 years of his life still has effects from his time there. Calvin has been home with us now for 2 months longer than he was in the orphanage and yet he still is trying to catch up with his peers. Calvin is at a 4 year old level for fine and gross motor skills (he is 6 years old). I would say his biggest obstacle is sensory input. He seeks sensory input most of the time. It is  mostly touch, but also oral and his body in space. Calvin falls a lot, which is difficult in the summer months because his knees and elbows are constantly bleeding and torn up from falling off his bike, running and falling etc. He runs and never walks! He is full of life and loves life. He is the happiest kid I know.

Calvin will eat anything and everything which is a blessing. He especially loves food that are spicy and strong in taste. He will eat raw onions, Indian food, anything that has a strong flavor. In his words today, " Do you know why I love pepperoni, because it is spicy".

Calvin is very intelligent, observant, inquisitive and outgoing. He loves to go out, wants to go places all the time. He can go to a place once and be able to tell you how to go there again. He is a quick learner, which is difficult for me because he is able to do 1st grade work but socially is behind his peers. I am home schooling him but he does play soccer right now, and is involved at church in their Awana program (memorizing scripture, playing games and Bible time). So he is interacting with kids his age, however he is socially like a 4/5 year old. We will probably keep him back a year in school because of this. Calvin asks questions my girls never have. How do plans fly, how do you stop the car, does God scratch his hand when he is itchy, etc. So we go to the library and get books so he can learn the answers.

Calvin has done well in attachment with us, which I know is usually a concern for adoptive parents. He still, however, is too friendly with adults. For example at Awana, he hugged the game person, who isn't a close friend of ours. No big deal right? Well, it is because other kids don't do that. I am a Sunday school teacher and none of the other kids hug me ever.  He knows we are mom and dad and we provide for his needs. He is an affectionate little boy. He asks for hugs and kisses all the time. He likes to snuggle in our bed too. He really has come along way. He pushed us away when he came home if we hugged him. But we continue to work with him about what is appropriate behavior with others and socially.

Calvin still has a difficult time entertaining himself. Some of it is personality though too. He is social and wants to be with others. He wants to play with someone, not alone. He cries if I tell him to go and play, he wants to play with me or by me. Calvin also cries very easily and gets frustrated when something is difficult to do. We have to take time outs to calm down. He is a very sweet boy, not malicious at all.

We are blessed and continue to help him each day reach his full potential. His handwriting has improved greatly, his reading is going well, he is enjoying starting math this year and he loves playing games as a family. He is full of life, and does everything fast! His language is great, however, he still needs to slow down and put his thoughts together to make a complete sentence. He will start in middle of a thought and expect you to know what he is referring to. 'Dad it makes a noise and is so fun', what makes noise Calvin? "The helmet makes noise mom! "

So that is our son in a nutshell. If you are a new adoptive family, I hope this was encouraging and if you are an 'old friend' we keep persevering and helping our kiddos be the best they can be. We love him so much and feel blessed to be called his mom and dad.

Update on Calvin

6 months later....
Calvin attended a charter school from September- November, and then we withdrew him. He is homeschooled now. Since being home he is reading, his handwriting has improved 100% and his behavior has improved. When he was in the Young 5's program there were 23 children and 1 teacher. Calvin came home every day saying he was off 'green' and on 'yellow' for not obeying. He started being disrespectful towards us and he was chewing on everything and exhibiting stressful behavior.

We felt Calvin would improve in his fine motor skills and writing if he was home with me. I was very happy with the OT and PT he was getting at the school but it wasn't worth it. Once we brought him home full time we signed him up for gymnastics/tumbling to help with his gross motor skills and muscles. He has come so far.

For homeschooling we have been using Handwriting without Tears and for his reading we use Learning to Read in 20 lessons. He is on Chapter 13 which I think is 1st grade level. He is doing awesome. He can draw his shapes now and all his letters so we will be moving onto the Kindergarden book in the fall. We will also be doing Math U See in the fall. His favorite things are painting, play dough, laying on the floor and pushing cars, pretending to be Spiderman and bouncing on his bouncy ball.  Starting in April he will be playing soccer again. He is looking forward to the treats.

On the medical front, Calvin had a cardiology appointment in February.  Without going into to much medical jargon  Calvin's doctors believe he has to have another heart surgery, probably next Spring Break (2015). His medications have been increased to see if it will make a difference. Looking at Calvin you would never know he was born with a heart defect. He runs and keeps up with his peers, he is busy busy. Our doctors keep saying he doesn't 'look' like his heart looks.

Calvin has come so far and we are so proud of him and all he has accomplished.  I will update again when he has been home 3 years in July and share with you all he he has accomplished in the 3 years he has been home. He is a different boy!

Spring Break 2014

 Calvin loved Mickey.

Calvin looking so much older with his new hair cut. He will be 6 years old soon!

Picture Update

This summer we went to Williamsburg, VA for our family vacation. We all had a wonderful time!

 First Day of School
Cathryn is 3rd
Caroline is 5th
Calvin is Pre K

 Calvin's new obsession is Spiderman as you can tell by his lunch bag and sweatshirt. He is requesting a Super Hero Birthday Party in May. He invites everyone he meets to his birthday, which he doesn't understand is a ways away. Calvin goes to school from 8-3 and is very tired at the end of the day, we have also seen some sensory seeking behaviors as he was nervous at school.

Celebrating 2 years

Two years today we drove to Dobrich from Varna with our translator in a yellow taxi. She picked us up after breakfast. I still remember thinking 'what have we gotten ourselves into?' I had butterflies in my stomach and was more nervous than the first time we met Calvin (5 months before hand). I turned to Chris in the cab and asked him if he was nervous, he said he wasn't. I then started praying and God brought certain verses to my mind about his faithfulness. Once we got to the orphanage, I was feeling calmer. We walked in and were directed first to the Director's office. She asked if we had any questions and mentioned Calvin had fallen and lost his tooth and that he had some scar tissue on his neck that could be surgically removed if  need be. We asked for any photos they had of him as a baby but they said they couldn't give us any. I am still very sad that we don't have anything of Calvin as a baby.
Pick up day was very exhausting for all of us. Poor little guy didn't get to bed until about 10pm once we flew from Varna to Sophia that same day.
All of this to say, I remember this day as if it was yesterday. We are so blessed by this little guy. God has been so good to us. We are far from being perfect but Calvin is so resilient. We have another appointment in a couple of weeks in Ann Arbor to check his heart and to make sure he is doing well on his medications. You would never know he was a heart patient unless you saw his scars.
Calvin didn't really understand the celebration last year, but this year he sure did. He kept hugging and kissing us saying we brought him home and we are the best mom and dad. He was excited to eat chocolate cake and swim in our new pool we had installed today.
Our son has come so far in his development he is now completely dry at night, not wearing diapers anymore. He is so proud of himself. He isn't falling as much, and is learning to hop on one leg. He is being more adventurous in the water, now jumping in and putting his face in. I am hoping with our new pool he will improve in his swimming. Starting in the fall he will begin Young 5's program. He will be going to school all day. He will still be getting OT and PT at school. They are thinking he will only need 1 more year of services. This summer we have been working on his writing (fine motor skills). I notice improvement each time.  Sorry for the long post, signing off with a photo from todays celebration.

Calvin is 5

 Calvin wanted a Thomas the Train party. We invited family and he was blessed with trains, tracks, bathing suit and toy for outside. He was so excited to play with his trains.

This week Calvin is being tested for Kindergarden. He has also been approved for one more year of physical and occupational therapy through the school system. He finished preschool the first week of May so we have been working on writing his letters, his name, doing puzzles on his tummy and a few other fine motor skills. He is showing some progress with his hand writing finally.