Not Losing HOPE

No news on the adoption front, trying not to lose hope. If this is the Lords will it will happen. If not, I rest in the knowledge that God's plan is perfect.

I have been struggling with my asthma and allergies these few weeks and so have Caroline and Cathryn. I have my 5k coming up in 10 days time and ran outside this past Saturday for the first time only to get an asthma attack after .8 miles. So walked for a few minutes and ran back home. Did only 1.6 miles. I am on my advair and proventil inhalers. Today was my second attempt at running outside. I did 3.1 miles in 35 minutes. I had to stop a few times to catch my breath, my lung capacity is not what it was a month ago. But I will perservere and hope to run on May 8th.

If for some reason I am not able to run the 5k I will try not to be disappointed in myself. Rather, I look at these past few months as reaching a goal I set for myself. Being able to run 3 miles, where in November I had a hard time running 5 minutes.

On a different note, we finished the book of James yesterday. What do I take with me now that I am done? 1. Love my neighbor as myself 2. Be quick to hear, slow to anger and slow to speak 3. Control what comes out of my mouth, which ultimatley means I need to be careful what i allow into my heart 4. Don't show pariality and judgement. God is the ultimate judge. 5. Trials test our faith, and we need to be doers as well as hearers of God's word. 6. We need accountability, confess our sins and pray with other believers. We are to also turn our fellow believers from sin and save their souls. I loved the book of James, so many wonderful reminders how we are to live as Christians in this world. Boy was it a convicting book.

Registered for 15 months now

When we originally started this journey we were informed that our wait would be at the most 18 months but most probably 12 months. Now we are at 15 months wait and will most likely not receive a referral until 24 months of waiting. It is soooo hard. I thought being pregnant for 9 months was hard, this is so much harder especially when your friends are having babies that started after you. It is hard being patient, it is hard planning vacations, it is just plain hard waiting on the Lord. Isn't it amazing how the Lord speaks to you in His Word. I am currently studying the book of James and today we discussed how we shouldn't plan our tomorrows, as we are a vapor in the wind. We might not even be here tomorrow. With the adoption going on, we are struggling with this one. Planning family vacations etc is difficult when you think you need your vacation days saved to travel overseas for the adoption. I am at the point now where I don't want to stop living, life goes on and we will just live each day to the fullest for His glory. The book of James has also taught me that we grow to maturity in Christ through our trials. I know this trial is not something huge like cancer or a death of a loved one, but it is a trial nother the less. I am learning to let go of things I can't control, not to be a controller of circumstances, lean on God, and to pray without ceasing, give thanks in all things and the one I need to still work on is rejoicing always! The book of James is so rich, another favorite book for me and very convicting.

Article by Martha Osborne - Rainbow kids

Bulgaria NOT Closing to Adoption Rumors April 01,2010 / Anonymous

Rumors of Bulgaria closing to international adoption are untrue. Bulgaria continues to iron-out its program to place orphaned children internationally. In a March 23rd forum between Bulgarian Ministry of Justice (MoJ) officials, the Social Support Agency in Bulgaria , and representatives of Non-Government Organizations, it was agreed by all to work more closely in sharing information about special needs and older children. It was also established that many more children will be added to the adoption registry during 2010, in the hope of allowing these children to find permanency. Due to the intensity of the work needed to thoroughly document each child's case before adding the child to the registry, it was acknowledged that patience must be exerted by each agency and prospective family concerned with the welfare of these children. The process will require many months before all children living in orphanages have a clear, documented case plan. A new Family Code was established in October of 2009 in Bulgaria . Before the implementation of this code, children often languished in orphanages with no clear plan for reunification or adoption (domestic or international). Under the new code, efforts are made to reunite the children with their birth families. If the families do not take steps to claim their children, then the child is entered into the official registry. The forum, which united 23 Bulgarian organizations for mediation in international adoptions, was to outline the first results of implementing the new Family Code, and the challenges and opportunities facing the state institutions, the capacity of municipalities and NGOs working in this field. During the meeting, representatives of accredited organizations expressed special gratitude to the staff of MoJ for their efforts in finding a solution for each child in institutional care.

Where do we stand?

So I finally broke down a couple of weeks ago and ordered blinds for Calvin's room. JC Penney was having a sale so I got them for half price. All that is left to buy for the room is a blue area rug. However, at this point I am not sure if it going to be a little boy room or a guest bedroom. News coming out of Bulgaria is very dim for families who are hoping to adopt under 3 children that are healthy. Older children and special needs are the main priority for Bulgaria.

***Disclaimer to adoptive parents, young healthy children in all countries are being adopted by the citizens of the country or in foster care. Special needs and older children seem to be the norm now for foreigners who want to adopt*** This is for China, Russia, Ukraine, Bulgaria. The only countries I know of that have young healthy children being adopted are from Ethiopia.

I am hearing from Bulgarian chat sites that young healthy children referrals probably won't be made until next year. So where does that leave us? Our paperwork expires Nov and we will have to make a decision as to how much longer we want to wait...Cathryn is already 5 and Caroline is 7. Heavenly Father, make your will known to us. Not our will but yours be done. God's plan is always better than ours.